Leading the Withdrawn

Years ago I was invited to sit in on a staff meeting of an organization I greatly admired.  When I entered the room I was greeted by a number of staff members before finding a seat at the large table where everyone sat.  Throughout the meeting there was laughter, thought-provoking questions, updates, and a lot of discussion.  Most were participating, but there was one individual seated toward the middle of the table who seemed like he could care less.  His computer was opened and he was more attentive to whatever he was typing than to the conversation.  He was disengaged and only participated when he was called upon.  Even then he had to ask the person addressing him to repeat the question.  He was withdrawn.

Occasionally, as a leader you will face the difficult task of leading a person who has become withdrawn.  You notice the person does not interact with others in the organization.  The withdrawn keep to themselves and do anything but contribute.  They may still do their job, but it is with minimal energy usually resulting in minimal results.  Questions are met with short answers.  Objections are met with a short fuse.  This is the plight of a withdrawn team member.

Depending on what the problem is leading the withdrawn can prove to be difficult, but not impossible.  Here are some common reasons people move from dialed in to withdrawn and what to do about it.

Hurt Feelings.   This is way too touchy feely for a lot of leaders, but the reason why many team members become withdrawn is because they have been hurt.  Maybe it was another team member.   Maybe it was leader of the team. Whatever the source of the hurt, it needs to be addressed so the withdrawn person can be reengaged.  Find out the hurt, apologize if appropriate, and move on.  If this team member is in a constant state of being offended, it may be time to rethink their position.

Dispassionate About The Mission.  A common problem with people who are withdrawn is they simply do not get excited about the mission or direction of the organization.  If you find this is the withdrawn person’s issue there are two responses.  1 – If the person is an all-star on your team, they may have some valid reservations about the direction that need to be heard.  The leader needs to listen and possibly make some changes.  2 – If the mission and direction are where they need to be, then the withdrawn individual may need to seriously think about whether this is the team they need to be on.

A New Direction. It could be that the withdrawn person is thinking about a new direction in their life’s work.  It may be working in a completely different field or doing something else within the organization they are already a part of.  Sit down with the withdrawn person and figure out a plan to get them from where they are at to where they want to be.  If it is leaving the organization, help them get to the next position.  If it is changing places in the organization, keep your eyes ad ears open to moving them if you value having them on the team.

Being withdrawn is difficult.  Leading the withdrawn can be even harder.  Define the problem the person has and work the solution from that point.  Don’t assume they are withdrawn for a bad reason or that they need to be let go (though this is the case sometimes).  Work toward a beneficial solution for the team and the withdrawn member if at all possible.